Class of 2019: Foolish Graduates
Last week, I chose to digress from a direct
writing-related post, and please bear with me as I deviate once more. :)
The time of year is coming up when young
adults get dumped with loads of cash, they wear oversized gowns and odd,
flat-topped caps, and they get to hold a paper that basically says, “You did
it.” There are parties, cakes with nasty, stiff flowers made from frosting, and
of course there are the over-asked, dreaded words of, “So, what are you going to do?”
Those words don’t come just at graduation
time. The questions start months in advance. There’s this feeling that you’ve got to
suddenly figure out your entire life. You’ve got to sort out your
feelings, your dreams, and what’s realistic, but the flood of confusion, ideas,
and options aren’t only from the inside. Parents have their thoughts and
wishes. Friends, teachers, and relatives all seem to have an opinion of whether
you should go to college or not, and why. People tell you to, “do what makes
you happy,” “follow your heart,” or “if you get a degree, you can make loads of
money.”
Getting flooded with the questions stressed me
out, made me feel like a failure for not knowing what I was doing, and I hated
it. It’s as if you’re in school and you’re fine, but then BOOM! Graduation hits
and it’s, “Plan
your whole life, kid.” There were
times that I wished I was back in high school, just to get away from the questions.
I felt that if I didn’t go to college, that I
would be a failure. But…I didn’t want to go to college. I didn’t want to dump tons of money into not
knowing what I was studying for. I considered a genuine interest of mine—psychology
for trauma counselling—but I felt like I didn’t have “the smarts for college
life.” Besides, I also wanted to write. But people kept talking about money,
and writing doesn’t
make me any money, so that didn’t count, right?
I didn’t get a job. I didn’t go to college. I
felt self-conscious about myself, but I didn’t want to find my identity in what
job or degree I had. I kept getting this feeling that God wanted me to wait. I
just wanted Him to tell me to do something. I wanted to do anything but wait. But I did. Two years later, I got my first
part-time job, and that job changed me. I’m a different person because of it,
and you can read more about that in Freedom from Discipline.
But in the meantime, there is an awful balance
that we’ve got to walk between doing nothing or rushing into something. There’s
the balance between dreams and God’s will. Do they align? What even is God’s
will? There’s the consideration of, “are we staying safe because we’re scared?”
Or are we being “bold” but unwise? There’re the options of college, trade-school,
work, gap-year, and everything else in between. Luke Kuepfer recently advised
me and several others to stop asking what God’s will is for our lives. Look to
see where He’s already working and join Him in that.
I believe that God puts dreams and passions in us that we
can use to glorify Him. Sometimes
those dreams don’t make us money. Sometimes He moves us away from those dreams.
Sometimes He uses those dreams to open our eyes to something else. And
sometimes those dreams come in the perfect time to join God in what He’s
already doing in the world.
I’m not trying to add to the pressure and
stress of planning what direction you’ll head. I get it. It’s miserable.
There’s excitement in the accomplishment, but that excitement got so dampened
for me. I felt terrible about myself; I felt stupid—foolish—around others.
Maybe you’re not scared or pressured, but
chances are…you are. I’ve concluded that even a lot of the people that seem to have it together
are probably terrified and unsure. And
their plans change as they go along. No one has it all together. That’s okay. Life is a process, a changing and
growing story, and you don’t plan it all in a couple of months.
I think that oftentimes, the people asking the
questions forget how lost they felt when they held their diploma in their hands
for the first time. Let me repeat: it’s okay to not have it all together. And don’t forget
what it’s like for the people who come behind you. Don’t expect them
to have it figured out perfectly either.
Wise counsel and input from others are
invaluable as you face these decisions, but may I remind you: you are you.
Remember that what “everyone else does” isn’t necessarily what God has for you.
Sometimes what He has for us seems foolish to the rest of the world but be
willing to follow Him in that, because that’s when He shows Himself biggest in
our lives.
Christine Caine shared a message where she
basically asked, “Do we love God enough to do what He wants, even if we look
like fools to the rest of the world?”
Does looking like a fool mean that we don’t do
what everyone else does? Does looking like a fool mean we wait even
when we don’t know what we’re waiting for?
Does looking like a fool mean sacrificing a
six-figure income for a passion that doesn’t make us money but changes lives? Does looking like a fool mean
investing time and energy in one or two people and
not millions that we have no access to? Does looking like a fool mean that we’re content where God has placed us and in admitting we don’t know
“what’s next”?
Unfortunately, the “after-school-choice” isn’t
the only choice in your life. Decisions, big and small, come at us more and
more as we get older. It sounds so cliché to say, “just pray for direction,”
but really, that’s the most important thing we can do. Also, a helpful, short
read may be What’s Next? by Todd Wilson.
So, as we go on into this new and quite
possibly petrifying phase of life, whether that’s graduation or some other big
step, let’s trust God, be willing to look like fools to the world so He can use us, and look forward to seeing the
end of the story He’s written for us.
And by the way, congratulations, Class of 2019. Foolish graduates are the wisest graduates.
…
“Define
yourself as one radically loved by God. This is your true self; every other
identity is an illusion.” – Brennan Manning
…
Comments
Post a Comment