When You Hate Your Novel
Like my writing teacher said, at one point or another
in your writing career, you’ll probably say, “I hate my work; it’s stupid.”
I’ve been there in the past, and in fact, the reason
I’m writing this post is because I’m there right now. I hate my work. It
stinks. Okay, I guess I know it doesn’t stink. In fact, the draft I’m working
on is my favorite, and the chapter I just finished came out alright, but at
this moment, I feel zero inspiration, I’m discouraged, and my brain can’t
think. I’m sick of being on my laptop, but I don’t know what to do besides
type.
At a young writers’ conference in 2017, I got to hear
published authors say they procrastinate, get discouraged, and get stuck. It
was like I could yell, “Yay! They struggle too!” The truth is, whether you’ve
been writing since you were four or this is your first year, whether you’re
published or just figuring out your main character’s name, you have been and will be stuck and hate
your work.
Here are some tips to help out when you’re considering
burning or deleting that piece of junk you’ve been working on:
It’s
not a piece of junk
Maybe it is to you right now, maybe it will feel like
that in the future, or maybe when it’s published, a lot of people will think it
is (sorry). But you wouldn’t have started it if you thought it would be trash.
Maybe you see your book in a little more honesty now
than you did at the beginning. I know I do. When I started my Vietnam War
novel, it was going to be epic, noble, and give my readers a tight throat. Ha!
But it’s coming along, and you know what? Maybe someday, with God’s help, it
will be and do those things. But it won’t ever get there if I delete it or give up on it.
Why
did you start this project?
Keeping that first point in mind, what made you want
to begin this piece in the first place? Go back to the spark that got you
going.
Don’t
write for yourself
While you shouldn’t be paranoid about writing to
please everyone (which is impossible to do), don’t put yourself at the center.
“Writing is a selfless act.” - Daniel Schwabauer.
Pick someone to do this for, even if they don’t know
it, and commit to finishing your project for them.
“Everything
that is written merely to please the author is worthless.” - Blaise Pascal.
My spark was for others. My first book did not start
out for myself. It was for Vietnam veterans and for God’s glory. My thinking
needs to be refocused onto those whom I started it for, because it is
much easier to let myself down than to think about the Vietnam veterans who
won’t be around forever.
Take
a break
When you’re tired and discouraged, maybe it’s time to take a break.
You may be frying your brain trying to cram in a word count or finish this
draft on a deadline. But if you are your only deadline and no one else is
waiting on you, if you’ve not been lazy and have truly been giving this project
your best, put it away for a little. And then don’t worry about it. Don’t feel
guilty for not working on it. It.
Is. Okay.
I’ve been pushing myself pretty hard on this draft,
but also feeling discouraged because I’ve been procrastinating so much. But
something I’ve discovered is that when I tell myself to not think about my
book, that’s when I begin to want to be around it again because I start getting
ideas.
Talk to God about it
I am a writer who follows Jesus, and I realize that not all
writers are. But for those who know Him personally, talk to God about it. Tell Him you think your book isn’t very good, ask
Him what He wants you to do with it, and ask Him to give you some ideas and to encourage
your heart. He cares about you, and He wants to hear your thoughts.
“He
gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength.”
Isaiah 40:29 Scripture
taken from the New King James Version®. © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by
permission. All rights reserved.
God
loves you. Maybe that means He’ll end up moving your heart onto a different
project but trust Him in that. Don’t treat God like a formula: put in a prayer,
get out a story. Instead, trust Him
to help you to write better than you could ever ask or think…because we are weak,
and writing is hard.
“And
He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect
in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that
the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities,
in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For
when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 Scripture taken from the New King James
Version®. © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
And
then, go back, open your word processor, and write.
…
What original reason did you have for
writing your novel? Is there a more meaningful purpose you could give it, to
push you onward?
…
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